Back to Back Issues Page
Sales is About Being NICE
July 21, 2015

Sales is About Being NICE

Greeting Sales and Marketer!

it blows my mind how some salespeople talk DOWN to their customers, think bad of them and treat them with a lack of respect. it is just like guys who want to ask a girl out who have only one thing on their mind while INSIDE do not really like the girl!

do you think that such INSINCERITY is hidden from customers? they may not show it but people can SENSE when you genuinely care about them and have THEIR best interests in mind. that is why the battle for your customers MIND starts with the heart

when i say that, what i mean is that you have to work on your OWN heart: look inside yourself and ask yourself what you actually THINK about this customer. if you find that you are JUDGING them and are inwardly CRITICAL of them then stop right there

there are only TWO ways you can continue to work with someone who you do not like and do not respect. the first is that you act like a HYPOCRITE and simply pretend that you like and admire them whereas secretly you do not

the second is when a customer and yourself go through the FORMALITY of respect and niceties whereas your customer doesn’t really care about you nor you about them and you both kind of know it. however, you both WIN by doing business together and so that is what you do

you should not have to be OBSEQUIOUS in order to win business but you do have to be NICE. just in case you’re wondering, being obsequious means “kissing up” to someone just for the sake of the deal while your feelings towards them are actually negative

the question then becomes, are we meant to LOOK for people who we like or are we meant to change our ATTITUDE about people that we are working with. the answer is, BOTH: you can only do business with people you “click” with but you can also change

understand that if your nature is to be CRITICAL of most of the people that you come into contact with then you need to change this. this is not the right way to be. it may be true that the average person is far from being a role model for humanity but what about you?

understand that we all share the same faults and foibles. all of us are a judgmental and selfish and self-absorbed and we all have done dishonest things and we are all rude and obnoxious from time to time. this is human nature and you need to learn to be tolerant

tolerance comes from being able to overlook and forgive the faults of other people. moreover, you need to actively try and form a good OPINION of others. remember, once again, that if you have bad thoughts about people you cannot succeed in selling honestly

understand that you need to HUMBLE yourself and not consider yourselves BETTER than your customer or anyone else. one of the best pieces of advice i have ever read about sales comes in the form of a Latin term, “tertia trium” which translates to “third of three”

God comes first, your customer second and yourself third!

a simple way to stay humble is to remind yourself that while you do not really know anyone else 100%, you do know YOURSELF. you know all of your secret thoughts and bad deeds so how can you possibly judge someone else? as far as you know they may have NONE of your own bad qualities and maybe they are just having a bad day!

search for and find ways to overcome your innate negativity towards people. i used to be negative and so have all other successful professionals. everyone goes through this phase and the SMART people figure a way to get past it (after realizing that they MUST!)

remind yourself that the same little thing that is bothering you about the next person is the same kind of thing you have done in the past. tell yourself that there may be a lot of good about that person that you do not know about and remind yourself of your own faults

the point is that if you are feeling SUPERIOR to your customer then you will not be able to really CONNECT and form a long-term relationship with them. if you think they are an IDIOT then you are the real idiot for thinking you can FOOL them forever

realize that the way people behave is rooted in their CONDITIONING and that a lot of the time people do not realize it when they are acting SILLY. treat people like you treat children who are ignorant and do not know any better. treat them with COMPASSION

if you think i am sounding like the Buddha and that this is all too much and that all you want to do is SELL and not have to become a saint… well, i am sorry to say that you have your work cut out for you: everything i have said is STANDARD practice for genuinely successful sales professionals

if what i have outlined here seems too much to you then this is because you are too used to the OLD ways of doing things. unfortunately, a lot of the time those old ways are dishonest, deceptive, draining and downright destructive of you and your success

unless you are being nice and genuinely sincere with your customers you are either going to BOMB or end up being stressed out, cynical and jaded after years and years of the same high-pressure/ low yield tactics. they may work but you will never feel EMPOWERED and EMPOWERING

if it all seems like an IMPOSSIBLE task then understand that this task is the whole purpose of life: to become a genuine, caring and all round NICE person. this should be how you are with EVERYONE and not just your customers. it all starts with INTENT

if you intend to become a better person you can and WILL find a way. overcoming the force of human “nature” – which is really only human HABIT – is harder than hewing mountains, digging tunnels and building skyscrapers. however, not doing so is HARDER in the long run

take it one step at a time. GREAT and successful people are faced with the same challenges as you. everyone has to deal with difficult people and situations. learn how to REPROGRAM you thoughts and YOURSELF so that you can succeed AND be happy

(425) 835-3581

Sales is SMILES, Marketing is MEASUREMENT

PS. liked it? please share it!

Follow me on Twitter

The Sales And Marketing for "You" Blog

Sales and Marketing for "You" updates

Get help with sales and marketing

Back to Back Issues Page